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Klaudia and Theda, an introduction
Mar. 6th, 2009 06:58 pmI don't know if I have any friends! I think I have a few? Hi, few:)
I thought I might just tell you something about myselves. Klaudia, Theda and the Integrated One (which is, yeah - both of us plus the person who makes her way through real life without going to prison for long stretches at a time).
I have two major writing loves, you see. Theda!me loves male on male hotter than hell stuff. What's hotter than hell to me isn't always sexual, but often enough it is. I just like the sex to be hinged on deep emotion. Romantic tension, angst. I like really passionate events and no safety nets, and by that I mean I don't always want the reader to be certain that everything will be okay in the end. Though I am deeply romantic, I will cringe if someone calls me that (see how I'm cringing even though I'm calling MYSELF romantic and God knows you shouldn't be able to embarrass yourself when you're all alone in a room but there you have it), because that feels so PERSONAL for me to tell you that. But I'm here to be personal. Somewhat. Well. I'm trying.
Theda!me is (as I said) romantically inclined, but my characters don't do long walks on the beach, flowers and champagne. Nothing against it. It just isn't in me. My characters are romantic in that they can't live without each other, and when I'm telling you their story I'm going to tell you about their journey to figuring it all out. The wayward asses will probably have to go through hell first. I don't shrink from putting them through all kinds of things in order to get them to open their eyeballs and SEE what it is they need to see. I make them suffer. Sometimes I put them in some pretty dark places. And dark is where Klaudia comes in.
So Theda's the romantic, but she's also a little too solemn. She has to work at relaxing - she's a worrier. She has to write sex or the tight-ass will EXPLODE (sez Klaudia, and now you'll understand why when I tell you Theda snaps at Klaudia sometimes). Klaud is a little goofier than Theda, sorta happy-go-lucky, and you know why? Klaudia!me is a BITCH to her characters, so she can afford to run around town caterwauling happily about whatever comes to mind after she's just gotten through dumping lye down someone's pants. Not a care in the world, that girl. She usually writes het (but don't for the love of God tell her she can't do anything but het or she'll write about a three way involving monkeys, some lube and a pinecone) and she writes horror. Not a ton of gushy blood and squishy bits - she likes getting into people's heads and seeing what makes them tick - so mainly psych horror. And I'll tell you a secret: she's pretty much a wimp when it comes to scary movies. Covers her eyes, asks her friends to warn her of certain unspeakable scenes, screams and shivers and shakes. And still she writes such stuff, who knows why? (She's so embarrassed right now she's stricken silent. That NEVER happens.)
And she also writes a little erotica, because Klaudia and Theda are related, after all (in a splitty kind of way).
I've been on a lot of romance loops and I see a lot of nice folks, but I'm talking about myself here because this is my LJ house and I'm (sort of) confortable, and not too worried about talking too much, and I just wanted to tell you a little about me and see if you like hanging out here. Would you like a beer?
So: I'm not good at small talk, though Klaud pinch hits. I'm not entirely comfortable doing promotions. I laugh until I cry and I do it loudly and I curse. I act backward for odd reasons. I think about weird shit. I make fun of things because I shouldn't or because somebody told me not to do it. I do a really good job of raising my daughters. My husband likes me a lot. I could do a bitch telethon at least once a month and never run out of things to say. My mom says I'm strange. She doesn't even try to read my shit anymore. I'm from the South and I grew up poor. I remain sort of poor and I don't worry much about it. I drink my mother's sweet tea with real lemon. My teeth appear to be all there.
When I post things or writing news having to do with Theda, I write FROM THEDA (stay with me now. ha!) Or I write FROM KLAUDIA (when uh, you know, it's from...never mind). Sometimes I write from the Integrated Ones when I have no idea what the hell I'm doing. Sometimes I'll just skip it, I can't cope.
Talk to me if you're feeling friendly. Tell me about the cost of a good pedicure, if you have sidewalks or green grass in your neighborhood, favorite sexual kinks you like to read about (not perform), urinary incontinence problems you may have or the secrets of the universe. It's good stuff.
I thought I might just tell you something about myselves. Klaudia, Theda and the Integrated One (which is, yeah - both of us plus the person who makes her way through real life without going to prison for long stretches at a time).
I have two major writing loves, you see. Theda!me loves male on male hotter than hell stuff. What's hotter than hell to me isn't always sexual, but often enough it is. I just like the sex to be hinged on deep emotion. Romantic tension, angst. I like really passionate events and no safety nets, and by that I mean I don't always want the reader to be certain that everything will be okay in the end. Though I am deeply romantic, I will cringe if someone calls me that (see how I'm cringing even though I'm calling MYSELF romantic and God knows you shouldn't be able to embarrass yourself when you're all alone in a room but there you have it), because that feels so PERSONAL for me to tell you that. But I'm here to be personal. Somewhat. Well. I'm trying.
Theda!me is (as I said) romantically inclined, but my characters don't do long walks on the beach, flowers and champagne. Nothing against it. It just isn't in me. My characters are romantic in that they can't live without each other, and when I'm telling you their story I'm going to tell you about their journey to figuring it all out. The wayward asses will probably have to go through hell first. I don't shrink from putting them through all kinds of things in order to get them to open their eyeballs and SEE what it is they need to see. I make them suffer. Sometimes I put them in some pretty dark places. And dark is where Klaudia comes in.
So Theda's the romantic, but she's also a little too solemn. She has to work at relaxing - she's a worrier. She has to write sex or the tight-ass will EXPLODE (sez Klaudia, and now you'll understand why when I tell you Theda snaps at Klaudia sometimes). Klaud is a little goofier than Theda, sorta happy-go-lucky, and you know why? Klaudia!me is a BITCH to her characters, so she can afford to run around town caterwauling happily about whatever comes to mind after she's just gotten through dumping lye down someone's pants. Not a care in the world, that girl. She usually writes het (but don't for the love of God tell her she can't do anything but het or she'll write about a three way involving monkeys, some lube and a pinecone) and she writes horror. Not a ton of gushy blood and squishy bits - she likes getting into people's heads and seeing what makes them tick - so mainly psych horror. And I'll tell you a secret: she's pretty much a wimp when it comes to scary movies. Covers her eyes, asks her friends to warn her of certain unspeakable scenes, screams and shivers and shakes. And still she writes such stuff, who knows why? (She's so embarrassed right now she's stricken silent. That NEVER happens.)
And she also writes a little erotica, because Klaudia and Theda are related, after all (in a splitty kind of way).
I've been on a lot of romance loops and I see a lot of nice folks, but I'm talking about myself here because this is my LJ house and I'm (sort of) confortable, and not too worried about talking too much, and I just wanted to tell you a little about me and see if you like hanging out here. Would you like a beer?
So: I'm not good at small talk, though Klaud pinch hits. I'm not entirely comfortable doing promotions. I laugh until I cry and I do it loudly and I curse. I act backward for odd reasons. I think about weird shit. I make fun of things because I shouldn't or because somebody told me not to do it. I do a really good job of raising my daughters. My husband likes me a lot. I could do a bitch telethon at least once a month and never run out of things to say. My mom says I'm strange. She doesn't even try to read my shit anymore. I'm from the South and I grew up poor. I remain sort of poor and I don't worry much about it. I drink my mother's sweet tea with real lemon. My teeth appear to be all there.
When I post things or writing news having to do with Theda, I write FROM THEDA (stay with me now. ha!) Or I write FROM KLAUDIA (when uh, you know, it's from...never mind). Sometimes I write from the Integrated Ones when I have no idea what the hell I'm doing. Sometimes I'll just skip it, I can't cope.
Talk to me if you're feeling friendly. Tell me about the cost of a good pedicure, if you have sidewalks or green grass in your neighborhood, favorite sexual kinks you like to read about (not perform), urinary incontinence problems you may have or the secrets of the universe. It's good stuff.
